Sunday, August 23, 2009

Dad's Memorial Service

Dad was born on October 28th 1929 in Baltimore, Md. 1929 marked the end of a period known in American history as the Roaring Twenties. His life was framed by the Wall Street Crash of 1929 which ushered in a worldwide Great Depression and his life ended with another worldwide depression. The Wall Street Crash of 1929 left an impression on my dad. As a result, he had a strong work ethic and was very frugal with his money. My dad was a “simple kind of man”

He was the oldest child of Walter and Catherine Krolczyk and the older brother of Elaine Krolczyk. He started life with simple beginnings. He was the child of 2nd generation polish immigrants. He lived near the Baltimore harbor. Dad only attended school untill the eleventh grade. However, he was self-taught with a fierce appetite for reading. He particularly liked reading about history. One would never have known that he was not a college graduate.

I imagine the advice he heard from his parents when he was grown probably sounded something like this.:

“Take your time... don’t live too fast, Troubles will come and they will pass. Go find a good woman and you’ll find love, And don’t forget son, There is someone up above.
And be a simple kind of man. Be something you love and understand. Be a simple kind of man.”

These are the lyrics from the chorus of the song Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd. I don’t think dad was a fan but for me it perfectly described the kind of man he was.

Dad did find and marry “a good women” named Lorraine Mueller on April 28th, 1951. She was 18 and he was 21. They had a Hollywood honeymoon at Niagara Falls.

While still living in Baltimore, they brought three boys into the world, Wally, Tim and me. Later dad transferred to Lawton Oklahoma and eventually we moved to Tulsa. Sometime in between getting married and having children dad decided to change his last name to King which is an English translation of Krolczyk (little prince) I prefer King to Little Prince.

Mom loved us boys (maybe not always) but wanted a little girl and my dad was a willing co-conspirator. In March of 1969, a little princess named Elaina was welcomed into this world by the King family. The King family now had a princess to go along three prince’s. Mom was content. I unfortunately had to relinquish the baby title to Elaina as her senior by 11 years.

Dad was working in the finance business all during this time. In 1975 dad made a drastic career switch. He went from management to laborer while working at Tulsa Ford Glass. He was a faithful member of UAW Local 1895.
During this time, dad coached Elaina’s soccer team and was excited when he found out at 28 that I was going to start playing soccer. Even though he thought he was “over the hill” at 50 he was inspired to play soccer also. So, he joined the “Over the Hill” soccer league. I’ve always admired him for this. Dad worked at Ford until January 1st, 1996 when he retired.

Dad enjoyed relatively good health until this year. He said he just felt tired after installing a fence at 79 years old.

One night at the hospital, he attempted to get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. He did not want the help of a nurse nor did he want to trouble anyone. Remember, he was a simple man. His attempt to get out of bed was met with unwilling legs due to a sleeping pill and the effect of the cancer that was weakening his body. He ended up on the floor in the middle of the room. His roommate Earl, who was admitted earlier that day for a possible heart attack attempted to help him but dad would not allow it out of concern for Earl. So, he laid on the floor until the nurses arrived. He told them “I didn’t fall” “I didn’t fall” he was laughing at himself while telling us the story . He told mom that he really didn’t fall he just “slithered” out of bed.

After we learned of the diagnosis, dad said to me “I’ve lived a good life with a great wife and kids. He was content and accepted his fate without complaint. And so today we say goodbye to him. A simple man who when confronted with his illness, never complained, was always positive and courageous throughout the pain. He set a wonderful example for his children. And his children helped him travel to the other side. Today, dad is alive in all of us.

These last three weeks it seemed that time had stood still. I kept hearing a song by the late Jim Croce called “Time in a Bottle”.

If I could save Time in a bottle
The first thing that I'd like to do
Is to save every day till Eternity passes away
Just to spend them with you
If I could make days last forever
If words could make wishes come true
Id save every day like a treasure and then, Again,
I would spend them with you...

Heb 12:1 says, “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down. On August 19th at 08:47 am, dad through off the weight of cancer and crossed over while his loving wife and faithful daughter held his hand and told him everything would be okay.

Dad left a legacy of ten grand children and 9 great grand children (with 1 more on the way) and many friends. He left this world on his own terms and his own time. He put his life in order, said his good byes. He was ready to go. As mom would say later He just “slithered” away.

I know that when he passed, we his earthly family and friends are mourning his loss but at the same time his heavenly family and friends celebrate his arrival much in the same manner that we will celebrate the birth of Henry, dad’s tenth great grandchild in November that he so wanted to meet.

Dad said to me while in the hospital “you know, I’m not a religious person but I am spiritual. He had read the bible, lived the “Golden Rule”, knew the Lord’s Prayer and along with Mom, believed in the wisdom of Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 and he believed in an after life.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 says,
There is a time for everything, a season for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to rebuild.
A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to lose. A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak up.
A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.
This is our time to cry, grieve, and embrace ...

Please join me in reciting the Lord’s Prayer
Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name.
Your Kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as in heaven
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our sins,
as we forgive those who sin against us.
Lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.
For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours.
Now and for ever.
Amen

This is poem “When I’m Gone” we believe represents his desire for all of us

When I am gone release me
Let me go, I have so many things to see and do
You mustn't tie yourself to me with tears
Be happy that we had so many beautiful years
I gave to you my love
You can only guess how much you gave me in happiness
I thank you for the love you each have shown
But now it's time I travel alone
So grieve awhile for me, if grieve you must
Then let your grief be comforted by my trust
It's only for awhile that we must part
So bless the memories within your heart
I won't be far away, for life goes on
So if you need me, call and I will come
Though you can't see or touch me, I'll be near
And if you listen within your heart you'll hear
All my love around you soft and clear
And then when you must come this way alone
I'll greet you with a smile and say
"Welcome Home."

I would like to end with another poem specifically for our family, it is called The Broken Chain

We little knew that morning that God was going to call your name,In life we loved you dearly; in death we do the same.It broke our hearts to lose you, you did not go alone.For part of us went with you, the day God called you home.You left us peaceful memories, your love is still our guide,And though we cannot see you, you are always at our side.Our family chain is broken, and nothing seems the same,But as God calls us one by one, the chain will link again.

Mom and dad hoped to celebrate his 80th birthday in October and to celebrate their 60th anniversary in 2010.

Thank you very much for sharing dad’s life with us.

No comments:

Post a Comment